Is Reactive Thinking Wrecking Your Professional Brand?

If your thoughts bounce from “she’s rude” to “they’re amazing” in the same breath, you’re not alone. But this pattern messes with your brand—and your ability to trust your own mind. In this episode I discuss:

• Why constant mental flip-flopping kills your strategic edge
• The hidden cost of narrating everyone else's behavior
• How to rewire your brain for clarity, confidence, and leadership presence

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Career Sabotage
• 1:13 Understanding Reactive Thinking Patterns
• 3:35 The Godfather Analogy: Trust at Stake
• 5:55 Reclaiming Your Professional Clarity
• 7:40 Thought Patterns Determine Your Actions
• 10:01 Call to Action and Closing

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hey, welcome back to the Career Refresh. This is where we unpack the moments that shape your work, leadership and growth. I'm Jill Griffin, your host, and today I am talking about a subtle but very powerful force that may be sabotaging your career, your professional brand, your personal brand. What is it? Reactive thinking? Because it's not just thinking. It comes out in your body language and your ways of being, and it's leaky and it goes all over the place. All right, so here's what I see happen In a span of a very short period of time, your brain is ping-ponging around.

Speaker 1: 0:35

She's doing it wrong. Oh my God, I can't believe. She said that. He is so rude. That team is never on time. Hey, I actually think you're doing a great job. Oh wait, do they think that I'm doing a good job? Your brain is all over the place. So if your thoughts are ping-ponging around like this in a span of a very short time, I'm going to tell you it doesn't just exhaust you, it doesn't just tap your brain and your ability to think clearly. It also impacts your professional and personal brand. All right, let's talk more Digging in.

Speaker 1: 1:13

First, what is reactive thinking? It's fast, it's emotional, it's fear-based, it's leaky, it's nervous, it's anxious, it's all the things. And listen, I've been there. I've been in places where I was hungry, angry, lonely, tired, not getting sleep, really stressed out, feeling really anxious, and then ping pong all over the place that your brain is firing off judgments, assumptions, comparisons. You haven't had a chance to reflect on any of these things, but you're believing each little bit of it. It's true, and we're not being intentional here and the more you react, the harder it becomes for you to think clearly, strategically, lead and be trusted. Because even if people don't know what you're thinking and to date they don't because it's inside we don't know how to read minds yet we may someday but they can see it in your energy. They can see the energy shift. They can feel the judgment, the disdain, the ennui, depending on how it comes across for you, right? So your professional brand, your personal brand for me they're kind of one in the same, but people use them different ways. It's not just, as you know, your resume, your LinkedIn profile, your bio, what you've done. It is what people are feeling after they have an interaction with you. It's your consistency, your clarity, your credibility, your values, your skills, your strengths, how you show up. All of that shows up over time, and when you're constantly in this reactive mode, you're going to be unpredictable. You're going to be emotionally volatile and people don't know which version of you they're getting, whether you're going to be super supportive and collaborative or whether you're sort of sitting in the corner in silent scorn.

Speaker 1: 2:56

If you've been listening to me for a while, you know that I'm a huge Godfather fan, and there it reminds me of like this reactive mode that you go into, reminds me of a scene in the Godfather where Sonny you know, vito Corderleone's son talks out of turn during a meeting with Salazzo and Tattaglia, right, and the purpose of the meeting was about, you know, do we do this drug thing? Do we stay away from it? And Sonny, excuse me, is impatient and eager and he's trying to make his mark and he's he's reactive and he's explosive, and he interrupts his father, don Corderleon, the godfather, and reveals a desire to do this drug deal. And it's sort of showing this split personality within the family's decision making and it basically leads Salazzo to believe that the Corderleon family is vulnerable and that, you know, maybe, you know, maybe they don't have it all together. And at some point in the meeting the Godfather says forgive me, I indulge my children and then says again don't ever, you know, share your thoughts and opinions with anyone outside the family.

Speaker 1: 4:01

Right, so it's a little bit of storytelling, but why I think it's it relates to this is that if you are so reactive that the people around you either don't really know what you might say in public or at a team meeting, or the people you're talking with are also starting to see that as a reputation risk for you, you can see where it is going to hurt your professional brand and you're not going to build trust. Right, people won't know what they're getting, and when you don't know what they're getting and when you don't know what you're getting and there's enough uncertainty out there, they're not necessarily going to want to bring you in because they don't know how you're going to lead and it's also going to hurt morale. So when you're constantly shifting your internal story, it also may impact your own ability to create trust. Should I speak or say silent? Should I say this? Am I overreacting? Was I solid? Was that okay? Should I not?

Speaker 1: 4:52

I recently did a podcast about sort of that social anxiety that may or may not be at a play here, about actually having the ability when you're in a smaller social situation, when there's not a script or content and you're just having a free conversation where that social anxiety comes up. So that may or may not be part of this here, but it's this idea that you have to learn how to manage your mind and to manage your emotions and to really think through what is the impact I want to create in this situation? What am I going after or what am I trying to achieve for the team or for my client? And therefore, how do I need to be?

Speaker 1: 5:28

When I show up, when you're constantly ping-ponging around and having all of these thoughts about everyone else, it clouds your thinking and then your body language, your tone and your decisions are going to show up and it's just going to create like just a space where there's a lot of confusion and it's going to show that the kind of thinking you're doing, which is reactive, is not necessarily strategic or helpful. So when you're going and you find yourself in this situation, just pause for a second. Is this something you do? Are there times in which it pops up for you Again? Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Just had a deal fall through, just had an unfortunate you know a failure. Right the times where we may be more vulnerable because we haven't cleared out our thinking or chosen how we want to think about those non-wins. Those are times also where that reactive thinking can really pop through.

Speaker 1: 6:27

So you want to reclaim your clarity, which, of course, is going to strengthen that professional brand. So catch yourself in the act right. When you see yourself doing this, you're really being the watcher of your own brain and again, laboring it. Oh, look at me, I'm reacting. Oh, my God, here I go again. I'm doing this, asking yourself what story am I telling myself? Right now, let me separate the story from fact. There's what I think that's happening and then there's what is actually happening, and getting as neutral as possible on what's being said or not said or done in the moment is really how you can separate those two.

Speaker 1: 7:09

Next, it's anchoring yourself to the brand that you're building. What version of you is becoming calm, clear, capable? If that is who you are, how would you handle this? How would you rethink your thinking? And again, we're not going to maybe enjoy everyone we work with. We're not going to necessarily like everyone that we work with, but're not going to necessarily like everyone that we work with. But how do we want to really think about. We don't have to have everybody over for Sunday dinner in order to do good work together, to collaborate and get things done. So that is what I'm asking you to think through Clear, calm, capable. How would you handle it? And then, where do you need to recalibrate? And then I also would suggest, like really practice moments of choice. These could be like smaller micro moments in every meeting, finding pause before you send that. Does it need to be said by me? Does it need to be said by me right now? Does it need to be said at all? Really thinking that through. Another one that I love is like is this is important in two hours, two days, two weeks, two months, and again, calibrate yourself accordingly and then really finding the time to find that pause, and the chances are you'll be able to start to build that muscle where you're responding, overreacting.

Speaker 1: 8:20

And then, lastly, it really comes down to understanding that your thoughts create your feelings and then from that feeling, you're going to take an action. So if you're thinking, oh my God, he's so rude, now you might be feeling annoyance or anger or frustration or mad, whatever you're feeling about that, maybe even disrespected. Now you're taking action from mad, disrespected, anger, anxious. You're taking that action from there. So, when you're doing this and when you're constantly in this reactive thinking, it is going to impact how you show up and it shows up in your results. So it's really simple you just pause and think through okay, I'm doing this, I'm being really reactive.

Speaker 1: 9:08

What do I want? I want to show up clear. I want to show up with kindness. I want to get this work done. I want to do our best work. Okay, how do I need to be feeling in order to do that? Confident, focused, determined, inspired, curious whatever word works for you. Okay, what do I need to be thinking in order to do that? I'm learning how to manage my brain. I'm learning how to manage my reactions. I get to respond versus react.

Speaker 1: 9:38

All of these phrases are things that are true, that you can believe, and they're all neutralizing and they will calm you down so that, in the moment, you are not in this wreckage where you're either in silent scorn because you're judging everybody, or you're in this wreckage because you're acting out and you're acting like Sonny Corleone. All right, friends, I appreciate you. As always, I love to hear from you. If you have thoughts or comments or questions. Send them to Jill at, to me, jill at. Hello at jillgriverncoachingcom. And, as always, here's to possibility and really think through. Story versus fact Separate. That Be intentional and always be kind. I'll see you soon.